I love how girls just decide that guys who don't like them must be gay
I do the same thing. If a girl doesn't like me...I am like, "i must be gay"
Shit sorry. Maybe I wont give you this sweet ass fanny pack I found in my parents attic
I just want to go some place where I can have a nice night. Grind on men who speak no English, make out with a girl, and not feel judged.
then mid-sex he looked at me and said "i hope this is as good for you as it is for me" and kept going.
This is the way my sobriety ends: Not with a bang, but with a whimper.
i took my sailor hat off and used it as a vom bucket
I have a king size bed, I guarantee multiple orgasms, and I'll give you a ride home in the morning. Respond quickly.
The bartender just asked me if I owned stock in Jameson. I've been here for less than an hour and he's already judging me.
Just got caught staring at a woman breast feeding. My only response was, "She's so adorable".
just in the smoking shack with my sister cheering on a caterpillar make its cocoon
Oh no. Did you guys fuck on my pull out couch?
MESSY REBOUND SEX HERE I COME! Time to start stretching to fit in my back seat again ...
Life achievement unlocked: I just ate a Slim Jim "Lady and the Tramp" style with a guy in a bar.
I mean it's up to you where you want to sleep but I'm telling you you're going to hear us have sex no matter what room you're in.
Fair enough
RICK FUCKING MORANIS!!!!!
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