yeah well you didnt even puke from the alcohol. we cut you off and went to huck finn's and told you that the "irish cream" coffee creamers had baileys in it, so you shot down like eight of them and puked all over the floor. it was great. we cheered you on and everything
She told you broke her computer after the little square in tetris wouldn't rotate for you...
i guess its officially winter break. i woke up alone and fully clothed this morning.
I think misery doesn't even think of me as company anymore. I'm an unofficial roommate.
I want to hold her baby but I'm afraid I'll give it a contact buzz
Just saw a cop give four blondes gas for their car on their way to Vegas. They seriously ran out of gas and called 911 about it. Its like a porno plot.
yea i really dont care about the sex, i just want him to eat my vag. He has to be good at because of his tremors.
He wants a "vagina fling" before he commits to dick for life. I'm gonna allow it.
Ok spinning in the opposite direction thatg the room was spinning was the worst advice ever
By the way I peed in a mug last night cause you were in the bathroom and im pretty sure it is still in the kitchen.
I just sent Brandon a snapchat where I wasn't wearing a shirt but had a rooster drawn on my boobs that said "cock block" and laughed for 10 minutes I have problems don't judge me
How is it that I, the only one that didn't drink last night, was the only one puking out the car window?
you know my pussy doesn't know between good and evil
You don't have to buy me dinner, watch tv or even hang out if you don't want. Just fuck.
We're hate flirting, damnit.
Randomize
