Is there a tactful way for me to ask a girl to let me know when she gets her period?
Can you please tell me why there's a bottle of urine on my night stand with a note that says "in case you're thirsty in the morning"? Thanks.
It's finally official that I am from Oklahoma. I'm currently sleeping with my ex-fling's brother.
think im gonna go get a six pack before class and sit in the back of the room...
If people don't want my drunken phone call then TAKE YOUR FUCKING NUMER OFF OF FACEBOOK, like it's just that easy...
It would only make sense that I'd cheat on him with his best friend on the ides of march...
How do you feel? I threw up in a towel. Also, a lot of other things.
Oh if we have sex in public no one will frown upon it. They will stand and cheer for it
This chick at the gym, just informed me I was super funny this weekend. Especially when I untied her friends bikini top after throwing up in the women's restroom. SWEET black out chronicles has another story
Your favorite boobs are sending you seasons greetings
I ditched my one night stand in the hotel lobby. How did he add me on Snapchat?
MY GOD WHY DIDN'T I TAKE PHOTOS OF HIS CREDIT CARDS WHILE HE WAS SLEEPING
I just loudly threatened to kill a self checkout machine
I could see the visible disappointment when she saw my penis
true. but still. you know how big of a sucker i am for a penis and a pretty face.
Randomize