And then I said "flip over. I want to show you something i learned in Afghanistan."
Small Doughy Asian men and sleeveless hoodies with nothing underneath do not mix well.
Sounds like the climatic scene of my favorite erotic novel.
My face smells like last night's lay. I need a whore bath. Or a corndog.
they need to just BURY HIM!
this homeless guy just told me to make a wish on his magic plastic spoon but said to be careful what i wish for...
So, does it mean i'm loose if he can't even tell when he fell out?
Just used "I used to work as an inflatable toy operator" as a pick up line. Freshman frenzy is great...
I distinctly remember seeing your nipples from the deck.
When we do our power hour over Skype I'm just going to sit on the toilet so that way I won't have to get up in the middle of it and miss any shots
I'm dealing with this like an adult, cupcakes and beer.
When did we convert life to cartoon?
i am rolling on molly so fucking hard i want to do 300 cartwheels
I'm crying during the second episode of Golden Girls that's how high I am.
I just made out with his twin, technically it's the same person..... Right?
we live vicariously through your huge boobs
Randomize
