Ducking stuck downtown...all the fuxkig roads are blixkded
no it's cool...i'm just drinking and studying...cool night
Come home. Power Hour by yourself is only fun for the first 10 minutes.
I love our strategizing... I wish we used the same passion for planning our lives and future that we use for planning our drunken escapades... We would both be doctors by now, I swear
he got everyone in a room, turned off the lights and started throwing knives at the wall. if you got hit, you had to drink...
My roommate took my designated hickey removing spoon out of the freezer.
I flossed his teeth and then we had sex in the bathroom. It just seemed like a good idea.
Yeah I don't even know dude. This shit has reached new levels of ridiculous. Let's hope baby Jesus gallops down a rainbow on a sparkling unicorn and wills that bitch clean. I think that's the best chance we've got.
I still can't get over the fact that he thinks I have my life together... That has to be one of the nicest yet most sadly misled things anyone has ever said about me
It's a sad statement on my day when the high point was getting a pap test.
I accused him of not drinking enough alcohol and eating tacos after midnight. I was sober and he's not a gremlin. I would say bad.
but real talk, he made 1 phone call last night and had someone bring us tacos at 3am so idk I might be inlove
He gave me an orgasim so fantastic that I had an asthma attack.
So, if you were also having sex around 11pm, then we were legitimately being penetrated at the exact same time. That is amazing. We are soul sisters.
I opened the bathroom door and the starting point gaurd was eating out my art history professor
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