4:33 am: Sleep on left side of my bed. T-shirts are second drawer on left side, boxers top right. I don't wake up when lights are on so feel free in my room..
drink some water, pull the trigger, get a bfast sandwich. Only good things.
Dude, I'm so high in the forest and I think I'm in a bear den.
I just know... :) goodntight
Whoops, meant "goodnight", but the other is true too.
2010 has been the year of the Eskimo brother. Let's see how many igloos we can shack in next year
He screamed "Hug me!" and dove into the bushes. How he gets laid every weekend is beyond me.
I might lose an organ but I've got booze. I'll be fine.
He will not just "come" out of the closet. He will fall out, 69ing me, with two fingers in his starving asshole, wearing cum splattered lady gaga sunglasses, weeping.
That was the greatest thing i have ever read.
Who takes their shirt off at the bar?! Classy broad
I do. In all fairness there was someone else's blood on it.
I forgot how easy it is to have sex in public when you're wearing a dress. Thank you global warming.
I learn from experience and I experienced what it would be like to completely lose my mind and then wake up with a stab wound.
After you threw up you would repeatedly say "napkin" like a siren until somebody got you a fucking napkin.
I just ran your car into a ups truck....but on a up note I have a handle of fireball and breakfast burritos
I can't be a daydrinker without you. It just doesn't work.
I love you too.
Is constant horniness a medical condition? Because a husband, a boyfriend and an office side piece should be enough penis for one girl - but they’re not :-(
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