I use a guy for sex and get three minutes out of him. go figure
My dad assaulted a TSA agent this morning. Shut down airport security. Don't tell me that your family is embarrassing.
Just found out that wake n bake is not one of the 7 habits of highly effective people..
Yes someone did see you carrying a beer bong on the side of coastal highway
hey, i'm all for honesty but let's not get carried away
That's why they call him "the cheesegrater".
he has a puerto rico area code and says his name is johnny cash. extremely suspect
This coming from the girl who broke up with a guy because she found out he played the tuba in middle school.
someone to text and fuck? since when does that constitute a relationship?
since 2006
That's the point dumbass, I can't use my boss as a reference cause they'd have to fucking call him in prison.
Do you think county jail has a Groupon?
He told me my outfit made me look like a twelve year old then proceeded with "but you don't look like a whore"
If I don't have tequila in my hand soon, I'm going to have to violate human rights laws
Dude, my sex life is so sad since I started having feelings.
Sleeping with just one person sucks
Well that's disappointing. I guess I'll give a lesson on dick-breaking another time then
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