i cvme to yuor rooom...wherer are youf?
please be gone before i get back
he invited me to an all week drinking party at his house. apparently he knows the key to my heart is booze shaped.
just saw my sister at the strip club... dont think she's "taking a night class over the summer"
is there an easy way to say "i didnt plan on sleeping with you until i saw how drunk you were" ?
you'd be alarmed at how much plan b i just found in mom's bathroom...
you're letting him buy you a plane ticket...to kentucky...so you can fuck him?
i know. i'm only adding to the interstate sex trade problem.
Only you would think wine and coffee was an acceptable finals study time mix
There was an ice luge. Lets just leave it at that.
We haven't even eaten dinner yet and she's already been asked to "take it down a notch" by the groom's mom.
Any chance you used one if the curtain rods in the fireplace room as a sword? One is missing
Made him watch 4 hours of HGTV then told him I was too tired for sex.
Savage
Are you aware that you called your mom to say hi before you dragged the random guy into bed last night?
I got pulled over by the same cop in a 4.5 hour window. Got off both times. Fuck yes.
I will consider today a failure if my nipple isn't bitten at least 😂
Oh is THAT how we're gonna play mini golf
I don't think he knows you can have sex sober...
Randomize
