You know how britney does the hair flip too much in her new videos? Thats me right now
why is it impossible to run with a back pack without looking like a giant d-bag?
haha... you gave me a great visual of you in high white socks running with a backpack with eye of the tiger playing in the background
that only happened once.
I love how girls just decide that guys who don't like them must be gay
I do the same thing. If a girl doesn't like me...I am like, "i must be gay"
i normally make it a rule to leave when white people start rapping... but they had blow.
you called me and cried until i agreed to record a rap about our lives with you
It was one of those "I have no idea if this will ever happen again so I can't say no" opprotunities. Part of me was like, "You slut" and the bigger part was screaming, "Hell yeah"
Absinthe night with my dad again, I could get used to this being home thing.
Can I just say I love the fact that were in business with guys where I can write a hand job up hoes down text message
No she probably looked into my aura and saw that my penis would ruin her.
Can I get that on a shirt
I can't help the fact that i'm turned on by white boys that look like Jesus
Did I just hear you ask Siri about the meaning of life?
I think I just did my first walk of shame. He sent me home with a watermelon from his farm. Southern one night stands.
I’m going to have to rewatch all of them. Drugs, man.
And ANOTHER guy that I once got naked is doing gay porn now. Wtf? Am I the audition?!
Hot guy next to me on the flight lives near my grandparents. There’s a 100% chance I end up drunk and naked in his hot tub
Happy Thanksgiving to me!!!
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