I find it funny that "sexual harassment" contains the phrase "ass sex". Let me know what your thoughts are on the matter.
He famously once noted that women should wear white "like all other domestic appliances,"
Im def. not watching the CMAs. If Kanyes not gonna be there whats the point?
apparently i'm the only person who has heard from her since saturday. she texted me "burt reynolds" at 2am sunday
just found out they live across the street from coke dealers... rethinking the new years resolution
Made a pan flute out of the varyingly empty beer bottles on the table. Played a glorious tune that paid tribute to the winds.
you ate the make a wish sign. Like actually chewed on it. It was our solution to going outside when the cops were there
Heres a quick tip! When getting black out head from your girlfriend dont come to and say "wait... wheres my girlfriend"
As my straight cousin I need you to answer a question. Are the Astros a baseball team, and if so, are they good? This is flirting related and time-sensitive.
Yeah, we agreed, but I feel like I need at least one more ride on the bonecoaster
This makes me appreciate being single with no prospects.
You sluts I'm so proud of you. You're both wearing underwear.
I'm texting you know although you won't get this until you wake up. the only reason you are strapped to your bed is because you were trying to fly out your window.
They think I'm one of them. I'm about to get drunk in a Santa suit and bust down the door singing Christmas carols.
Came up to an intersection and someone was blasting My Chemical Romance at like 9 AM. They're DEFINITELY having a good day
Randomize
