The girl I brought home was really impressed with the pile of blow you were doing while watching "Intervention."
I am growing concerned with the number of people here in cowboy hats
hungover subway ride filled with german tourists and a mariachi band. too early. too fuckin early
How do you feel about fucking me quick and then me leaving to go do arts and crafts?
he can show you his cooooock\nshining, shimmering, splendiddddd
What can I say? When alcohol is my motivation, I can move mountains.
She is wasted and this random lady got her to suckle milk from her tit
he sent me a pic of his dick and balls out with sunglasses over them like a face. i was at dinner.
do you still have it? i kinda want to see.
I just realized I haven't got laid since the last time the Browns won.
I get so many dick pics from him...He has an unhealthy obsession with his own penis...
Charles Manson is Getting Married and I stare down at my tits and wonder how I am possibly single.
he won't tell me his last name, but I know his garage key code
Dude just walked up to me, gave me his number and said, if this number ever calls its my penis,better keep that one handy. I cant lie its the best pick up line ever, im calling his penis.
I want sex. When is an appropriate time post funeral to ask for something like that. Like when it gets dark out?
Of course his biggest mistake was assuming that I ever gave a fuck to begin with.
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