is it bad that i kinda- ok, reallyyy don't remember having sex with him last night?
Did your girl go home? Did she have fun? Can we have our friend back?
apparently i walked up to the counter, put $30 worth of snacks next to this girl, and went 'uhh i have no money'
Whenever I'm sad I just imagine if babies were born with mustaches...
just survived the first fart of the relationship.
He wouldn't know what to do with his penis even if they made a "how to get a blowjob for dummies" guide
the last thing i remember is unlocking the door. its like i was literally opening the door to my blackout
Nothing like a $37 iTunes bill. Jesus Christ do you know how many $2 beer/shot specials that is??? The answer is 16. 16 beer/shot specials.
Drunk
Deyhxbr
Fucaerrrrr
I decided that Calgary can keep my underwear. They earned it.
Besides asking our teacher if he enjoyed being fisted did I have any other tragic moments last night?
My only objective is to get drunk enough to forget the last 364 days.
I bought Plan B for the first time and an interview outfit today. You could say my life is improving.
You have the perkiest tits in all of North America. You're fine.
You know the rule about how you feel bad for getting food and not offering other people you're around, does that apply when you eat burger king at a strip club?
Randomize
