im sorry i didnt take advantage of you..iwaned to
i wanted you to too
i'm watching the tyra show: "women who beat up their boyfriends" - lets see how she can make THIS one all about herself too.
The only birthday messages I got from men were from my 8th grade boyfriend and the bouncer at our bar. I think I'm doing something wrong in life.
i don't even remember going to get food. i think i got gas too.
My coke dealer 411'd my work number just to see how I was doing and gave me his new number. He must miss my business
Just woke up and my doorbell is on my nightstand... the fuck?
Thanks for stopping me from letting that 14 year old feel my boobs. Thanks.
So much beer in the passenger seat the seatbelt light is blinking
I mean I don't object to weird looking penis as long as it gets the job done. I just need to get it in. I'm gonna be humping chairs soon.
Will that be creepy to wake him up at midnight with my tongue all over his body??
"Yeah because the first thing I think of when I hear the word college is tear gas."
Thanks for listening. You're the first guy I've ever worked with who I didn't want to fuck.
I pay 3K a month for rent, yet last nite I broke into the back of my building, scaled over 2 tons of garbage in heels and took a dirty freight elevator to my floor just so my doorman wouldn't see how fucked up I was
U know ur prob on camera right?
went to class still drunk this morning and my professor made the class give me a round of applause and said, "see people, THIS is inspirational... if she can make it to class in this condition there is no excuse not to show up!"
as a lesbian i'd like to thank joe biden and also america for giving us this absolute MILF for a VP
Randomize