Is there a tactful way for me to ask a girl to let me know when she gets her period?
forget your mom, you can see her anytime. A one night stand only happens ONE night.
She kept saying I was her favorite Jonas brother, and for some reason, I was ok with that.
Still in Rome. Hooked up with frat boy from SoCal that's studying abroad. He said he was 1/8 italian. I'll take it.
Tried to eat a chip. Mouth wouldn't cooperate. Nearly died. Wow I've missed this.
I think her version of saying goodnight was being flung over a guys shoulder as he said, "Bitch. You don't need no shoes."
I'm going to die alone in my chair and get eaten by my cat. That kind of break up.
Can we please get on skype for like 20 seconds so i can show you my penis and the spiderman temporary tattoo that is right above it
Got a minor my first day of college from the bike police. I'm gonna like it here
Care to explain the single rose and the package of "Cowboy Moustaches" I found on the porch?
it went well until I said "me" instead of "my" and he kept sexting me in character as a pirate
I need to you to send me drugs via FedEx
No it's a real cult, with original ideas and shit like that
I think I gotta smoke less weed, I'm getting to lazy to fuck my girlfriend
I threw up in 4 different Starbucks across the city before 9 am.
Randomize