Potential corruption. He's 19.
Get them while they're young!
I think that we as people have rights and that we should at the very least be warned before being subjected to Fergie
they just started talking about wanting to bang stephanie tanner from full house
after we finished we were both getting water at the kitchen sink...butt naked
so?
then my sister's foreign roommate walked out...in footy pajamas
I have big tits. Rules don't apply to me.
how was last night?
i woke up with my hand stuck in a jam jar with my keys in the bottom and a dog licking peanut butter off my boobs. you tell me.
this study room smells like vodka
the study room thinks the same about you
someone just puked in the library. they put up caution tape. i totally underestimated finals week.
I just licked the seasoning off all the doritoes in the bag. Tell me when I should stop drinking or I'll just move on to the sunchips
Update... last night a man tried to bite my ear. I think he swallowed my pearl earring.
I forgot to tell you, wear something you can puke on Saturday. We're christening this marriage with a shot of jager. NOT KIDDING.
We weren't even through customs yet, and we got offered weed. You would love Jamaica.
I cannot FaceTime with your penis
Can you come pick me up and take me to breakfast then the police station?
Where's your car?
The girl I brought home apparently stole it
These are the things that make me so grateful... that I slept with your sister instead.
Randomize
