mark looks like s**t tonight! thank da lawd we broke up!
it's mark...i'm guessing you didn't mean to send that to me...
He's a collector of sorts
Any cool stuff?
You should see the collection of booggers in the carpet next to his desk
Apparently 151 is to me what spinach is to popeye.
we do all of our sexting over chat on words with friends, so my boyfriend doesn't know about it when he looks at my texts.
I love seeing you outside of a bar. It's like seeing a dog walk on its hind legs
drunk enough to think that masterbating in the pool is an awesome idea
last night we were having sex and i didn't care if i got off. i was just holding up my hand behind his head so i could look at my new ring. i think he knew.
disregard all texts ive sent you minus taco motherfucking bell
just 'accidentally' changed my relationship status to 'in an open relationship' just to see what offers I might get if I were to dump him. it's not looking good
Is it possible to have pulled a muscle in my neck from passing out with my head in a bucket?
I woke up this morning at 8 to my roommates still drunk, hanging out on the roof, and screaming at bikers. They couldn't figure out why they were into it.
We kept trying to bring you to the hospital but you had a tantrum and kept saying you would never be Miss America
I just gave a bum a ride back to his bench. Columbus is weird but I like it.
no. i discovered the *exact* amount of drugs i need to do to understand calculus.
he can suck his own dick, i cant compete with that
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