I'm a grown ass woman and I'm sitting in bed eating pizza at 4:30 a.m. BFD, right?
So we went to home depot to buy supplies to build a beer bong but ended up buying an office water cooler that were going to put vodka in
who loves string cheese????? I LOVE STRING CHEESE!!!
you know...if you didn't give such great head little things like this would ruin our friends with benefits relationship.
Only you would think wine and coffee was an acceptable finals study time mix
I'll come out for a little. I can't be visibly hungover at work again or I get written up and fired. And yes, I am aware of how alcoholic that sounds.
This is most sickening thing I've ever seen, and I threw up my body weight in jello shots on my birthday.
So which one of you fuckers changed my backgrounds while I was passed out to me holding a chicken like the statue of liberty?
Apparently I was drunk enough to call he police station and ask if there was a problem with me.
I have already put on my inside pants.
Open the door and I will lure them out to freedom with viagra and candy orange slices. You know they love that shit.
She was just trying to do dick voodoo. Pretty standard stuff.
i was really depressed when i left the health dept this morning after i had to write a higher number next to "partners" than "age"
Lol I'm just saying its too early for your penis, I can accept it but at a more decent hour
Just got back from a Walmart run. The music went straight from Kid Rock to John Phillip Souza. If that doesn't scream 'MURICA I don't know what will. Happy 4th!
Dude, I'm sorry if you saw me getting head in my truck last night. My bad.
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