He lasted like 30 seconds. With a condom. I just expected more from the president of a frat.
The heaters out again. Makin a fire in thebroke toilet for warmth.
Lets just fuck. We'll decide if it was makeup or breakup sex after.
I'm trying to make a sex playlist
record yourself crying and put it on a loop.
how are you shocked you fucked her? sure shes hot, but she also washed your beerpong balls in her mouth..... you should probably get tested.
How did I roll 7 times this month and survive?\nI must be some sort of ecstasy goddess
So the " I'm gay but curious" thing worked. You owe me 50 bucks.
Our DD has become famous. Strippers are asking to be handcuffed to him.
apparently I like to do this thing where I wear pretty dresses and then pee on things on public. Picture proof. Four times last week.
This is my college life. Rolling at 4PM on a Wednesday to skrillex in the parking lot of a mexican restaurant.
He painted a swimsuit on me. Naked day at the lake was a success.
He used a trumpet as a funnel, said something about valve oil, and puked all over the garage.
She's the good dick fairy. You buy her a beer and half an hour later the best lay in the place is asking to take you home.
I'm shrooming way too hard to deal with your bullshit at this particular point in time
I love you. I would never turn you into a bear.
Randomize
