new midget porn idea. Wizard of Jizz: Munchkins Revenge
Is King's over? Or do I still have to say 'On Matt's cock' at the end of every sentence on matt's cock?
Lost is over, my longest committed relationship is coming to an end.
Some guy just stopped me in the bar and asked if I had a shot named after me at another bar called God damn my VaJana hurts? He already knew my name was Jana so I couldn't deny it!
They want me to get them some X for there wedding present. I'm on the way to get it now
I think I'm interested in anyone that recognizes I actually have a pulse
You are right. The scrape marks on her ass are from her breaking the doggy door by crawling through it.
Yes but that point is quickly negated bc u should never have to search more than one room to find your underwear.
Did you get any last night. I need to track my forever aloneness
We left the knife in your bed.
OMG IM A TIGER AND I LOVE ROARING
How would your parents feel if we installed a sex swing?
And some neighbor just saw me naked and hunched over a bag of potato chips stuffing my face. Maybe clothes aren't a bad idea.
He wants another date...I mean he's cute, but I just am not ready to give up my glamorous single-girl lifestyle here.
you mean the one where you drink out of the carton and don't wear pants?
Yeah, and pee with the door open. It's the little things.
let me assure you that a rugburn on your forehead is the worst side effect of tequila i have experienced to date.
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