Just invented new drinking game watching Hocus Pocus... everytime they say "virgin" wetake a shot and yell out "to j****"
i should have probably stopped drinking when my beer pong shots were hitting the other team in the face..
yeah thats usually a good indication.
It's amazing how much better one feels once you put something in your vagina.
No, I think it was the night I threw up in her front yard. You're thinking of the time I threw up in her backyard.
There's gotta be a happy medium between the guys who only want to sleep with me and the ones that respect me too much to try to sleep with me.
you know you have a brother who cares when he hands you a piece of pizza before you pass out from too many bong hits
Sometimes familiar penis is best. Its like comfort food for your vagina.
I have to stop envisioning penises as dragons.
Steve watched craig and I have sex from the top level of his cat tower this morning.
I accidentally mass texted his dick pic. Not only to my friends, but to my dad as well...
My professor just paused class to answer a phone call from her dog. Im taking shots before this class from now on.
your mom was just petting me...I am strangely comfortable with it
I'm sorry, but if I hear stories of you getting fingered in the ass, and selling weed, you are not coming to my party.
Let's just face it you're going to have an arrangement with your future wife your fuck me on Thursdays
I got sriracha sauce on my mask while I was eating fast food, now wearing it makes me hungry
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