I just opened a gallon of milk that is good through the 10th of January- I hope I can say the same for myself.
Had a speaker in class today. She asked whats the first question when you see someone pregnant. I said whos the father? She was looking for "is it a boy or a girl?"
I refuse to have another spring break doomed by pregnancy.
Honestly, I've had enough of his asshole to last me the new year.
Please tell me you're talking about his personality.
It's home.......I'm going to the store in disguise to get skittles and cake frosting. Then I'll eat the frosting in a dark corner while I cry and wonder what I did to deserve this.
After Madison dropped a bottle of full vodka an it shattered on the floor, it was quiet for literally 3 min straight and then drew said "the booze gods have spoken"
He left an apology note saying he had to work and that there was coffee, OJ and food on the table with two Excedrin. I left his spare key with the door guard and she said "too bad I don't go for skinny white boys or I'd jump you both!" Best one night stand ever.
i'm scootering my little heart out so i'm not late for a weed pickup. this is the meaning of adolescence
I really shouldn't be this use to hearing "YOURE THAT GIRL?!?!"
Where the fuck do you get consience sedatives from?
what are you going as for halloween?
drunk, naked, & emotionally unstable
Im wearing black today mourning the orgasm i couldn't get this morning :(
Either my apartment is haunted or I'm far more drunk than I thought
Pride log, day two. Noticing more bruises and scrapes. Liver functions probably very lowered.
Nope. I'm an adult now. I can successfully avoid to vomit in defiance of the porcelain god\n
Randomize