I'm skeptical of all drag queens.
he used the word "rubber" i just couldn't do it after that.
Just found out I slapped a vegan in the face with meat last night.
These 5 days benders will be the death of me. Just living and breathing is a struggle right now.
Woke up with pink eye in both my eyes. That's how the threesome went
drunk lawn darts. Let's test the homeowners policy
He looks like he has a penis
What the fuck
A good one, a good penis
Yea, i was tied up and blindfolded. And someone was throwing chicken nuggets at my face.
i knew you were okay when you wanted to eat in the ambulance
I feel like we had some profound moment last night, but I can't really recall much past your ass turning up the volume on the radio.
Well, I want to see you regardless of whether or not you will lick whipped cream off my body.
You handed me a red solo cup filled with vodka and Bacon. You called it the salty Russian.
Is it bad that I'm tindering right now? I'm naked on his couch while he's slaving over legal documents for work. And he doesn't have cable, so what else am I supposed to do?
I just got a lecture from your coked out sister about the monetary value of Dothraki hair braids. Take her home.
it was weird i started the party in just my underwear and woke up in my clothes
Randomize
