i am NOT doing that with my feet, or any part of my body
Sorry I totally forgot to text you back. When you texted me I was at work at the pharmacy and it was stupid busy. And then of course I had my 8 hour "shoot me b/c half of Loyola comes in to buy plan B" shift.
im covered in puffy paint and glitter i cant find kevin and im wearing shoes that dont belong to me....come get me please
Im beginning to think that if I ever write an autobiography it will have to be mostly fill in the blank.
I WILL STOP HOOKING UP WITH GUYS EX'S FOR REVENGE. I WILL STOP HOOKING UP WITH GUYS EX'S FOR REVENGE. I WILL STOP HOOKING UP WITH GUYS EX'S FOR REVENGE.
No need to get angry I'm just tryin to get my door back
all my mom knows is what I put on facebook. So... I mean... She knows we drink a lot.
You were saying you didn't want to go home and insisted that I drop you guys off at your uncles. That's how you ended up sleeping on a porch with two dudes
COOKIE DOUGH CUPCAKES ARE A THING
Did you really just send me a blank text in response to news as awesome as that?
Bake him heart shaped cookies?!? Send him a picture of your tits like an ADULT!
He started yelling terms of endearment at a cheese sandwich. Then he tried to hump it.
Have you ever been so drunk you pass out in the cab and everyone goes inside and forgets about you? I have
Woke up with a lip tattoo that says "fake news" in case you're wondering about my wellbeing
he's the kind of guy you give a fake number to and he still finds out your real number anyway...
you ate an entire watermelon by using a CD as a spoon, then proceeded to chuck the leftovers at some dudes car...
Randomize