Girls don't like it when you cum inside them and then discuss baby names.
So we fuck and I say, "I'm about to go." He tells me, "No, leave at ten.. just lay here for a little while." When I ask, "Why?!" He gets his feelings hurt and says, "ugh. or don't." Since when did guys start acting like girls?
i love how cold weather makes identifying sluts easier. is it below freezing? is she wearing a tube top? she's easy.
Its time to go balls to the wall to get any good D during these last few weeks of college.
Btw...pregnancy boobs are amazing. I don't recommend pregnancy in general but the boobs are good.
You know, there is no convenient place for your beer when you are on shrooms taking a shower.
drunk. just smoked a spliff with a 19yr old hungarian bike taxi driver and bonded over the difficulties of getting weed in a different country. idk y shit like this isnt in the study abroad info packets
Nope. He totaled my car then moved back to Louisiana to work things out with baby mama. I sure know how to pick em
You were pouring Patron into the window of the squad car trying to get the police dog to drink it
So thats why that cop beat my ass?
Probably
It's really not cool dreaming about going into labor with your ex boyfriends love child as you're sleeping next to him.
Get this. He's a red head and he works at country oven bakery. He will forever be known as the gingerbread man.
I think there's a problem with society when I'm shopping for lingerie and I think "man some of these would make kickass shirts"
Rigtt?!
His brother just asked him in all seriousness if it would be cool if they became eskimo brother brothers.
She shit herself again. We're calling her the "Queen of Sharts".
Too high to wash a dish but just high enough for a kitchen fire
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