Got a toothbrush?
I just cut my nipple shaving
Its the little things i like about bein home like having actual toilet paper instead of subway napkins
my financial goal is to have my cable back before football season starts
Can you bring me a pair of sunglasses to the bathroom please... Don't judge me.
I think ur a lot drunker then u think u are. That girl has the body of a cartoon character and not in a good way.
thanks for piggy backing me around for the rest of the night when I got too drunk to stand.
Giving you good advice and being naked are not mutually exclusive.
When one of my seniors asked "Rough night?" I realized my poor decisions involving Tuesday night drinking did not go unnoticed.
Remember that girl from my stats. class that I ran into at the bar 2 weeks ago? She literally hasn't been to class once since I told her I sit behind her.
Life is when you're laying naked in bed, eating Double Stuff Oreos with your boyfriend, blazed as fuck. Happy 4/20.
On the other hand, this could be a new level of shame for me.
Someone needs to fuck me in my slutty pumpkin costume and I would ideally like it to be you
At least I got steroids and a baguette out of the deal
You know you started drinking too early in the day when you have a hangover at midnight
thats called having FUN
Randomize
