I'm gonna cuddle the shit out of you tomorrow
So I'm stoned for 420, and have an eye doctor appointment in fifteen minutes
Are your eyes okay
I mean if I was Asian they would be
Nakedness is not a toga. Just sayin
and those juicy C cups turned out to be oddly-shaped A's when her padded bra came off.
You should have seen the look on the cashiers face when I was buying steel reserve with a suit on.
the chair was smiling at me in sociology and i had to try not to burst out laughing.
i don't even remember going to get food. i think i got gas too.
I'll be gone when you wake up but you hit a girl so I knocked you out. Never hit a girl. Unless it's with your penis.
For sure shouldn't do homework after beers and joints. Just cited like 3 sentences at the end with (History, 2013)
Not my type, but the penis looks fun.
She pinched my nipples out of nowhere as I was about to come... I think I found god
I got a 5 dollar bill, 1 condom, and no alcohol. I get payed on Thursday. Let's do this shit.
do you remember your solution to not spill your drinks last night? .. Shots, that way you wouldnt have time to spill them. i love your drunken logic haha
Don't make me do math I'm drunk and full of chicken
Took the ex out to the bar, then left with her and her best friend....and you said this was a bad thing.
Randomize