C thinks vomiting on the batroom floor = reaon not to party. Lies. Party continues.
The worst thing about having a parent with a prius is that they can walk in on you without any warning
all i remember thinking as i was puking my intestines out is : wow.. this toilet does look like it's from the future.
the guy next to me needed a pen, so I let him take one from my book bag. my panties are now being passed around the class...thank you for telling me you hid them in my bookbag.
They went to the hospital to try backflips in the parking lot. Be ready for the call
They're taking me to ER. Mistasnkingly. Come get me.
You said you were going to take the sideview mirror to your own car so that nobody would steal it. Thats why you woke up with it.
I have discovered that there is nothing that a giant penis attached to a southern accent can't talk me into. yee-haw!
You might have crossed the line by jerking off while she was in the bathroom taking a prego test. Just saying
If the Cards come back I will fly to St Louis and shit in a very public place.
Dicks are so weird. He has kind of a feminine comforter in the background.
What's life without a pregnancy scare?
She told me I was absolutely not allowed to sleep with him even though she knows I'm a rule breaker who loves a good challenge.
Apparently, im the only one in the world who thinks Larry King is hot.
Found your bra
Where?
Hanging in the tree
Randomize
