he was uncircumcised...I HAVE NOT YET REACHED THAT SKILL LEVEL OF DICK
Spotted at kelly concert- 10 year old in a homemade "I do not hook up" t shirt. Well I should certainly hope not, sweetheart.
He felt like a one man threesome
So at what point while he was throwing up on the girl next to him did you think "yeah, im going to hit that"
The fire breather is here so I may get my second wind.
I think she faked a seizure to get out of it ...
I applaud your efforts, but I have to say it was the bear we encountered that ultimately shut down the entire operation
Dance move was taxi-ing on the runway then taking off in a plane. All the boys wanted to beat you up cause they were like "who is this angel flapping her arms like a bird in the bar i must have her"
I'm instituting a new rule. If you wake me up at 3am about wrinkled blankets, I get to throat punch you
If you come home and I'm pantsless with cake smeared all over my face, I'm sorry.
You told me that you were mad me because I wouldn't let you 'explore my castle'. Then you said I smelled like a hospital and passed out.
We watched the first ever season of SNL and fucked for so long. He accidentally punched me in the face, but I mean, John Belushi was the background noise of our sex. I can deal with it.
If you think you're having a bad day, know that upon waking up, I was informed that I blew my nose in a piece of bread last night
I went home with him again and he LEFT HIS OWN HOUSE at 2 in the morning while I was IN THE BATHROOM.
Never. No amount of alcohol could convince my brain and eye sight that it is okay to fuck him. I'd rather fuck my cousin.
Randomize
