I really hope your girlfriend didnt have your phone while i texted how much i loved doing it in HER car with you :x
I don't think its a good idea if I moon a whole bar again
I really wish I didn't have to wear pants this is ridiculous
his cum shot went directly into his bellybutton. felt like i was playin ski ball
Everytime I see a couple on campus walking and holding hands I just want to yell he's gonna lie!
1 month til my stepdad becomes a u.s. citizen, so if you want to get in on the divorce pool its your last chance, $5 a square.
Pretty sure the purpose of joining wine clubs isn't to drink the 2 bottles they send you each month IN THE SAME NIGHT.
So I feel like I should feel objectified by your comment about my boobs but instead I just feel proud. 21ST CENTURY FEMINISM, BABY
how the hell were we supposed to out run the cops in a bus?
That happens a lot to the people around me. It's like I'm radioactive but instead of cancer, you get desensitized to the word cunt
WHY DO I KEEP FINDING CHICKEN THROUGHOUT THE HOUSE? GET YOUR ASS HOME NOW!
I might run out into oncoming traffic. Id rather break my legs and/or die then continue with today.
YOU CAN'T GET A TATTOO BECAUSE OF KPOP FANFICTION. THAT'S NOT HOW LIFE WORKS
This is why I only drink in places with a C or D health rating
Is it a bad thing when vodka doesn't taste like vodka anymore?
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