Taljing aboutpenisrs w gerruly ska pops
He was crying to my sister about feeling like a bad person. Then he groped my breasts.
He set 8 alarms to make sure I took my birth control on time..
OMG HAIR ON HIS DICK. HAIR ON HIS DICK AS IN GROWING OUT OF HIS DICK. HAIR.
He kept telling me how extraordinarily clean my ears were.
Side note: I think I fell asleep holding a cereal box
I'll still trying to understand the context of your "punch her with my cock" comment.
You aren't going to like my movie choice because it's a Disney movie, but I am cordially inviting you to the couch for blowjobs.
Because she seems like the type to give it up for a box of fruit rollups.
Best case scenario: sex with hot bartender \nWorst case scenario: no sex and punched by tattooed guy that may or may not be said bartenders boyfriend.
I'm stuck in a tree and request your assistance ASAP
just wanted to eat pizza off his dick so he let me and he can never forget it
If ur gunna go fuck a guy that's in the baseball hall of fame do you need to shave your legs? I'm so lazy
But being sober is boring. Everything takes so long, I feel like I'm just waiting in line to die.
at the hospital. Kevin drank straight from the river
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