Having a conversation over beer pong about a threesome I participated in...it's only Wednesday
It was amazing what she could do with her one good arm.
I'm glad you talked me out of that flying penis tattoo.
Forget abc fam drinking games. Take a shot everytime Tyra says I and you'll be dead by the first commercial
Dude you just tried to have a one night stand with my ex girlfriend while we were trying to put you to bed upstairs.
but that still doesn't explain how i woke up on the couch down stairs.
my girlfriend just compared my daughters eyes to gollum from lord of the rings.
hes a soccer player too.. you'd think he has better penis eye coordination
How do I invite him to our 4th of July cookout without sounding too much like "hey you were my first orgasm and I want your dick inside my while watching fireworks"
Just stuffed an entire cupcake in my mouth after finishing third glass of wine. Valentines day is pretty much going how i expected it.
you had me at cake vodka
I kept telling you not to give them blowjobs, but you kept screaming back, "it's okay, we're friends on facebook!"
Hypothetically, I throw a party and my ex-boyfriend and my current fuck buddy are in the same house... what should I do?
How many beds are in the house? Hypothetically...
That butt dial turned into a booty call.
Either it didn’t do much damage or I’ve lost all feeling in my asshole
So I might join you on the drunk train on the way to poor decisions.
Randomize
