If that was your dad, he is hot
i puked out the bus window last night on the way home. i remember it, but i don't remember everyone else screaming to put their windows up.
Sex on a kitchen table is not as amazing as they make is seem in the movies.
i was so high it looked like the chipmunks movements were coordinated to that lady gaga song
tonight i'm making a christmas tree shaped shot pyramid
I need to stop fucking people before I get to know them
How creepy of a mustache can you grow by wednesday night?
i jsut waqnnna hugg thw crap outa sokme peoplee
i wish i had a super power and that that super power was shooting out mdma from my fingertips or something
second roommate of the year to get clamydia. go life.
Whenever we go out my brain flips on autopilot, straight to blackout.
6 tequila shots, 3 kamikazes and 1 rumplemintz.. The next day I puked in my office trash can while doing payroll. I may have to dock my own pay for lack of class.
Well I'm going to hell. But I'm going after multiple orgasms.
So we were in bed when his brother walks in, walks over to me, fist bumps me and says he just wanted to say hi, then leaves...so random lmao
So I thought you might like to hear how I went to sams club to print some pictures and suddenly there was 20 pictures of your dick and my snatch on the screen
Randomize
