went to sleep on the couch in jeans and socks. woke up in bed totally nude no memory of moving. best farewell party ever
did all my christmas shopping this morning at 4am drunk. never went to sleep. i was walking home drunk last night when i passed a target and saw 3 kids having a dance off. had to join. somehow they convinced me to go shoopping with them. i bought 4 disco balls and a lava lamp.
I mean, she is a dancer for the Suns. If I didnt fuck her that would just be bad team spirit.
I've had cake for breakfast the past 3 days. You tell me how bikini season is going.
Am i fat?
Well i wouldnt let you on top
After what u did to that bathroom I think the $30 and the "sorry I'm a jackass" note was the thing to do.
dude he was laying on two half-naked chicks, as they rubbed him down with lotion, while rolling a joint. hes like a modern-day african king
Now he's trying to use the tornado warnings as an excuse to get head. Yeah, b/c THAT'S the last taste I want in my mouth b4 I die...
I was passed out in a dog food bowl tor two hours. Just tapped my dinner beer. I love homecoming.
No it's only my right leg that feels like it's about to fall off. The left is fine.
It was all good till you had ppl chasin shots of ciroc with fucking applesauce
Naked and Afraid: Hangover edition
We shared a dick. We're practically sisters!
If that guy asks u bout me, I said my name is Jenelle, from CT, I'm a cat behiavor consultant and I'm 29. Back my story up
So you were shitfaced and stole a fucking kayak?
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