yup put them legs up on your shoulders and eat her like some folgers
eat her like coffee?
I just wanna not walk straight. Is that too much to ask for?
Who are these men, what are we doing here, how is this helping us toward our goals of sex and pasta? Things to consider.
So this whole chlamydia situation totally puts a damper on my back to school sex schedule, there's just no way of knowing who of them was the perpetrator... Time for new candidates
The only excuse this guy at the club had for trying to make out with me as soon as I met him was "I AM FROM MEXICOOO"
if i actually get asked out by my dealer what could happen?
i don't know, but it probably involves bathtubs full of weed
plus there's no nice way to tell a guy you physically hate the shape of their cock.
I gave a very stressed out cashier a mini bottle from my purse the day after Christmas. It's what Jesus would have done.
You're a good person. Sharing is caring.
Woke up pants less in the vacant apartment across the hall. It was unlocked because they were showing it to someone. When they walked in I woke up and said "this is a great place to live" and walked out
Dude, you stalking his LINKEDIN profile will NOT affect your chances with him. We aren't 40...
It's the third day of class and I got told I smell like a distillery.
You had sex with a Scottish dude with a peg leg....how could I NOT tell that story??
Woke up with a throbbing vagina and a lesbian in my bed. Then for the hell of it we had morning sex. Definitley bisexual now
I'm peeing on your house...you up?
I climbed on the arm of the futon, flapping my hand fan frantically and hissing imprecations at the smoke detector
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