So we've decided on 'hamburger' as your code for tonight. If you add ketchup or fries, we know the threat level has escalated.
he puts the penis in happiness.
I just want to go some place where I can have a nice night. Grind on men who speak no English, make out with a girl, and not feel judged.
Outta milk. Using rum instead for pancake mix. Drunk Thursday is a gooo
there is no excuse for him not showing up to my st. patrick's day party. i touch his dick. i get him on the high holidays.
planned ethnic drinking holidays while bored at work thru next may. I don't suppose you have any scots or russian in you?
Going to.goingto.gtoing to DIE DIE DIEEEE......i feel like everyeone impotrant in my life like MLK is judging me.... saddd day
i introduced myself to everyone by my new name, thundergooch. i threatened the neighbors with a hammer when they used my real name. needless to say, sailor jerry was not kind to me.
Haha. I got you. I always pay you back somehow. Do you accept all major forms of payment: cash, taco bell, and patriotic underwear?
My condoms might be a little big for you but hey, a big sweater is better than no sweater at all when it's cold right?
Fool me once shame on you. Fool me twice and I'm the idiot missing half an eyebrow again.
Did you clean his pubes up off the table yet?
Ask me if I'm sitting naked in a lawn chair eating a block of cheese waiting for a bacon grilled cheese sandwich
You were pretty conviced that my dog was a spanish child and kept trying to read him the news from your iphone app
she passed out standing next to the car. her head hit the door so hard the alarm went off. she instantly snapped out of it and started sprinting away
Randomize