so we were pounding it out and someone knocked on the wall and was shouting at us
that didnt stop you
nope
if i found out she had a dick after i got head, does that still make me gay?
And then he said "my dick isn't hard enough and your tits aren't big enough for this to work"
mom just told me i had to find a fake by next wednesday.
Found a cheerleading trophy in my shower this morning. Explain.
I'm having horrible flashbacks of being groped by Pauly Shore.
It's only been a week and i've already broken my no summer randoms rule twice.
WHY IS IT FROWNED UPON THE DRESS UP IN CAT COSTUMES AND SIT OUTSIDE OF BARS WITH A BOX OF WINE I THOUGHT THIS WAS AMERICA
Is "head down ass up" an appropriate way to say good morning?
I HAVE PIZZA MONEY AT ALL TIMES IT'S CALL EMERGENCY PLANNING
We'll never be able to grow apart now. You can't look at a stranger & say "Yea I ate goldfish crackers off his dick." & just be casual about that.
Ive never seen a drunk man get suplexed before last week, now its the standard requirement every time we go out.
I can hear the pillow talk now, "how many condoms did you bring? Good, put them all on,"
I mean, it's a romantic picture of pubes if I've ever seen one
Date with Air Force guy was nice btw. And for my next trick I'll talk him into fucking me in his fighter jet at 30,000 ft.
Randomize