If it makes you feel better, you're better at taking it in than ass than she is...
Well...yeah actually, that does make me feel better
...you put a chicken patty in my toaster last night..
I don't know if you realize how depressing it is to get your card denied....when you're only spending $4.
We planned for the zombie apocalypse. In great detail. Of course there was booze involved.
just started drinking the sprite you used to ice your crotch last night. Missing you already
I mean this holiday was built on cheap beer, shitty whisky, and processed meat... and I fully plan to honor that
Should I be curious about Jeffrey randomly sending me a picture of him holding a crab, or just move on with my life?
The only way i can get arrested is public drunkenness or defacing a national monument. Trust me, i have already looked it up.
trapped on the roof of the strip club. help
Here's how he asked the pregnant girl for a cigarette. Hey yo prego throw me a square. Not joking.
Remember when there was a happier time when people could all hang out together with out the awkwardness of the fact that she stole $1000 and cheated on a brother with another brother !?!??
Teenager with grandparents staying in their room: is to blue balls, as parent waiting for teen to come home safe: is to sleep. You will live- love mom
its just been over 12 hours, and i`m dying, don`t know how i`m supposed to survive the holidays sexless
Went home w the NY Islander in a NY Rangers jersey, needless to say he was pissed
Just screamed wow while using my vibrator.. new low
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