i popped this huge zit on her back while she was blowing me. it was like a disgusting metaphor for what happened 30 seconds later.
I think I just sold my virginity for plane tickets
I think i just got paid for sex with a hot pocket... and i accepted
hey as creepy as this sounds i still have your eyelashes on my desk
Accidentally spilled a drink on her roommates skirt, offered to clean it, and got a blowjob out of the deal. Something went horribly right.
I was unaware that a tutu and pasties was appropriate attire to this
We had phone sex and he came in his sink. i will never eat off one of his plates again
there were staples in my comforter. what kind of sex did we even have?
Didn't get to fuck her. Had to leave abruptly through window. Explain later.
He came in 20 minutes late for his final wearing plastic bags on his feet, and a tablecloth cape. Explain.
This may be a weird question to ask someone who is 21 years old, but are you grounded?
She's throwing herself an "I just had a baby" shower, where she makes up for 9 months of sobriety then squeezing a watermelon out of her vagina.
He's mad at me because I said I wouldn't date him if his dick was smaller. I fail to see the issue
On my way to return shoes I bought so that I can afford to buy a pregnancy test. Is this adulthood?
Actually, my eyes didn't start bleeding until the next day. So it was a pretty awesome night overall.
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