Sandwiches eeeeeeverywhere.
I never thought that I'd ever use the phrase "and the resulting ice cream explosion" seriously at work...
Give me one situation where peeing in your garage could be a bad idea
it wasnt like "sexy" or whatever. like...she was smiling just standing there butt ass naked
tasteful.
Only you can can turn Jenga into a drinking and then a sex game.
So he told me he didn't have a condom, paused, and then said "so, pulling out" and tried to high five me.
At the time, making out with dudes for keg money seemed like a genius idea. Now I realize it was borderline prostitution.
At one point I went looking for you and found you handcuffed to a chair. I'm pretty sure you handcuffed yourself. I don't know how you got there.
I think I died last night. I had 14 beers..well 13 1/2 if you count the one that got spilled on the baby in the elevator.
Yeah it'll definitely be worth it. Not having syphilis all the time you know
Classic dick move. Breaking up your buddies 3-some by coming into his room and doing the Harlem Shake.
I didn't want to leave, I wanted to move into his ass
Can you repeat that, but with context?
You know it's a pretty bad night when an injured penis is not the worst thing that happened to you. Fuck tequila
Typically a man doesn't buy a woman a drink in hopes of her laughing at his penis, but no one said I was normal.
Randomize
