Cold hands, warm shart.
I'm like a rollypolly, I only open my legs up when I feel safe.
Pretty sure my dad just walked in on me jerking off watching guys on webcam. Remember how I used to say "most awkward day of my life?" I'm retiring that phrase.
One of her kids, Dakota I think, got stuck in a ceiling fan and she had a fit, thats when she found the penis hat.
Just bought a waterproof mattress cover. Bring it on sophomore year.
We're watching a video in class about cheese. The scoring for it sounds like that of a Lifetime movie. My mind is creative. I've continued my own story in my head of a wheel of cheese that was raped and murdered. It's so sad. I hope they get the guy. Btw, the video is about marketing.
And now thanks to shrooms we all got a terrifying glimpse of what goes on in his head. I will not say I didn't see it coming when it turns out he made a suit out of people's skin
I've injured myself in such a way that i am only capable of making love standing up now
I got about 15 snapchats from you with your hand saying "you want cheese sticks" or something like that and one of some weird looking weed
Just realized I used a picture of my little sister to holler at a guy, only 3 months old and she's already my wingman.
Just left a strip club where they let me on stage to teach them tricks. Time of my life!
Naked. naked and bneed help.
My Captain America poster fell down. Cap is disappointed in my life decisions.
we need to make pact to not cut each other's hair on coke and whiskey nights.
While I agree, I dont think thats realistically possible
No, this year you're all getting coupons for things like "no yelling because you had sex in my apartment" or "the last beer."
Randomize
