I feel so much closer to you now that I heard your poop splash into the toilet.
btw, her name was actually Alixx. in retrospect, it was pretty much a gimme
Party at my house. Liquor pinata. Your presence is required.
i decided i'll just settle for a gay guy who can manage to fuck me like the straight guys do. but here i go again, talking about my dream man.
We saluted the chips to the national anthem before cooking them. The house has to get a munchies fryer
Everyone threw up but him. I took off my shirt because I puked on it. There were also a lot of drag queens involved.
I feel like every picture I upload of him on facebook where you can see his purity ring, I should make the caption "something in this picture does not belong"
Okay I can't even be mad, I'm in mid-plot to hook up with Michael Phelp's third cousin.
I had an epiphany. If a dude dressed up as Batman to ask me out, I'd prolly marry him.
And he came by and picked me up. We cuddled in his car then had sex until... an officer doing his rounds put a spotlight on crazy haired, naked me straddling him.
Like he was inside me when I made eye contact with a police man.
I haven't had to masterbate since I started dating him over a year ago. I don't even know if I remember how and my vagina is calling.
And you hate the library
Yea but I love drugs and my grades
We're both fucking guys named Frank. Our friendship was meant to be.
If we were unicorns we would fly together. Like in a pack. A pack of flying unicorns
I can't talk, I can't walk, I think I'm twitching and I'm not even sure if I'm typing this. Help
Randomize