so high. i feel like my whole body is a boner
I think god was stupid personally. The clit should be inside the vagina. Idiot.
My parents just told me I first got drunk when I was 4. Successsssssss
Banged a lazy eyed chick last night. It was like fucking an iguana.
She handed me a mouthguard and said "here, you're going to need this" that rough.
"Whiskey Cheerios" was a terribly great idea.
I'm going to superglue stuart's hands into socker boppers
I feel a bullet train of disappointment headed in your direction.
When I don't want to forget things I put them on my cigs.
C smoking isn't all bad
i'll llet you know if at any point this night starts to make any sense
There should be a promo code on the Papa Johns website for "I have no moneys but if you send a cute delivery guy I will pay him in blow jobs."
I need a nap, Harry Potter movies, and dick in this exact order after work.
Hypothetically speaking how does one remove a lamp that they hypothetically superglued to the ceiling?
Acetone nail polish remover, and you lied about studying last night didn't you?
Oh definitely.
You can accomplish quite a bit with a can do attitude and a well placed ice cube.
What are u up to today?
Marathon sex and eating.
Randomize
