i never knew gatorade would taste just as good on the way back up
Dude ur right that IS what a vagina looks like!
Do everybody a favor and GET LAID MORE.
Note: fake nails and fingering anus.... Not a good idea
i wish that every time i slipped on a sheet of ice i had the ability to recover with a michael jackson move
i have a $600 bill for my ER visit in which they did nothing but suggest to me that i am an alcoholic.
He just kept telling me how to do certain things. It was like I was fucking my sex ed teacher
I forget the details, but I'm told that I drunkenly stalked him around floor yelling obscure Jewish laws at him
Don't make it weird, I don't think about you when I'm climaxing, it's just that I see you rooting me on.
Hey guy that stepped on my foot, don't slap my ass to apologize.
also karaoke with swedish 7yr old and drunk 50yr old = best idea ever
He made a deal with his real estate agent called fucking in 50 properties for sale
There's a big difference between a penis and a toilet.
Stereotypically, lax bros last the longest, but have huge egos that are annoying. Baseball players barely last 10mins, but are really nice. And than we have soccer players, last long and have no egos. Me and my friends have collected our findings.
Legit hope my Trump humping Brother dies of this shit so I can stop pretending to still love him.
She was blacked out at her own party. It felt good to stand next to her while she laid on the floor and say "vomit does not look good on you."
Randomize
