I have to look really hot tonight because my personality is going to suck.
I was like, "um, that's my butthole."
Four minutes until I can fart!
is asking a girl out on a date while in another girls bed in poor taste?
i rewarded my self with tacobell for not throwing up on any one. MISTAKE
Whenever I said your name you screamed polo and did another shot.
Agreed. And i highly doubt it could be awkward. You do remember our introduction was a direct result of you mentioning your affinity for my genitals, right?
There was an ice luge. Lets just leave it at that.
Three people drank on "never have I had sex in a tractor." Iowa at its best?
I fucking give up. OKC is where small penises go to disappoint me.
it's like i'm making a family tree of tunnel buddies for my vagina
They filled a kiddie pool with lube and glitter.
Hey babe! Random question. Do you by chance have the pic of my nipples covered with ninja turtles band aids? Thanks.
You don’t need a wing man if you have a solid hook up on the pumpkin pie
Moms passed out wet and naked in a rocking chair again....
Randomize
