I know it's VERY late and i know i may have burdened you, but on the chance that it's sat nite- are you up or willing to be? Christinas camping and i'm chillin alone.
I'm drinking ghetto ass mojitos!
Wow. How can mojitos be ghetto?
Squirt + bacardi limon + limes = ghetto mojitos
Don't get me started, it sucks when the one thing you have in common with a girl is not wanting penis inside you.
your boyfriend is drunk and yelling to the bar that he loves his cats
Hes flirting with her via the sauce packets at taco bell....... I have no words
And with me just getting pulled over and you maxing your card out on tennis balls I don't know if we can afford it
She had one drink in her cleavage and another in her hand. She kept rotating between the two by leaning backward and then sipping the one in her hand.
I'm chatting with a girl missing a front tooth. I find it quite distracting. I'm sure you have deduced what bar I'm drinking in on this monday night.
In other news there is a guy at my office who I'm pretty sure will be wearing someone's skin as a coat one day.
I don't want to flatter myself but after the way he was looking at me today I think it might be me.
I just came so hard I growled. Definitely found my gspot.
You are the best. Or certainly adequate for tempering my unholy desires.
That's the nicest thing you've ever said to me.
So vagazzling was a success
just saw the most amazing side boob. i wanted to hold it.
I feel like hooking up with you on my floor, sneaking out my window and jumping a fence is an effort that deserves a happy birthday.
He's the one named Andrew. In his profile picture he is the one on the right in the monkey costume.
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