yeah so this exboyfriend of yours reckons you're still together and he punched me in the face cos i slept with you last week. you might wanna have a word with him or at a minimum change your facebook status.
There isn't a single transaction on my online bank account that doesn't involve drugs or alcohol since November 12
She started to tell me how she goes to a shrink, so I started thinking how to sneak out of her place, then she said part of it was for her sex addiction, long story short she's got her clit peirced n I just got laid
Some fat girl belted her graduation gown. That is not a good look for anyone.
I know I know. I considered playing it sober but after I typed out IS SHE A GENIE? I knew it was impossible to hide.
Make good choices ;) This is your automated cockblock message
i wish i had the videos of us pissing on him last night.
one of the service guys here said i licked ranch off your face lastnight
He thought the strainer was a giant bowl to puke in.
yes he does come on. what guy wouldnt want his penis named after a dragon
I dont know how to respond to your rave picture. I mean yeah, he's hot, but it just seems wrong to be like "Please tell me you fucked that guy with the pacifier!"
She got the hiccups while deep throating me. It was epic. Once in a lifetime experience.
also please imagine me hopping a fence at 3am using two chairs. It was a shit show. K's guy practically ripped her off the top of the fence bc she got semi stuck. It was like watching Disney on Bud Ice.
sex in a hospital.. check
Changed all my ex bf's names to "no" in my phone so the next time I try to drunk text one of them it'll basically be like Russian roulette
Randomize
