I woke up to her vacumming the grass
I was eating her out when she coughed, I just swallowed a bright red blood clot
Ssssssssssshhhhhhhhhhhiiiiiiii!iiiiiiiiiitttttttttttttttssssssssssssshhhhhhhhooooooooowwwwwww. Letters for emphaSSIIISISEEEE!
Rosemary is literally sitting on the ground holding on to the rug because she thinks she is going to fall if she lets go. We smoked way too much.
animal crackers drenched in taco bell mild sauce... surprisingly delightful
breakfast of champions
breakfast of stoners
Can't a woman sleep on the floor in her own apartment in peace without being judged?
Her boobs felt like beanie babies from heaven
Plan B, arranged marriage to a rich Indian, is rapidly becoming Plan A. Fuck Finals.
we were sitting in the kitchen and you kept biting my shoulder saying "itll all be over soon"
I just asked her to come in through the window, this pretty much solidifies the whole fuck-buddy thing...
If I'm not drunk and wearing a penguin hat by the time we are done opening Christmas presents then coming home for Christmas was a complete failure
The only person who DOESN'T think it's a horrible idea to sleep with my ex is my therapist. Obviously I trust her judgement above all others.
It must have been good head...he put down the Xbox controller
we went to go get waffles and then i sucked his dick in a parking lot. average tuesday.
I just sold Adderall to a priest, im not quite sure how I feel about this situation
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