so i just saw your dad embarking upon a biking journey in full reflective gear
...this stays between you and me
Moved my bed either I'm a whore or every guy I have ever slept with hid condom wrappers under my bed
a queef is a wish your heart makes.
apparently it's not kosher to shit in a litter box when there's a line for the bathroom
KATE. I JUST NOTICED THAT LOWERCASE D'S LOOK LIKE SLIPPERS.
Planned Parenthood should have gift certificates.
If you dont, I will tell Dad you are gay.
Fine, and I will tell him you fucked his business partner
Previous statement retracted.
I just deleted all the drug dealers from my phone, I guess this is growing up
drunk taco night MLK would want it this way.
he told me he was a chubby chaser.. then winked. i'm signing up for a gym pass as we speak
So he's compensating for a really small penis. Either that or he's a drug lord.
Oh my god I would go to planned parenthood the same day I get my nipples pierced
Some Romanian guy at work just told me "you come my house, we drink beer and you come make fuck with my sister"
If he's not there watching you go for it. It's been a while bro.
But you''re still having sex with him. And a hobo convinced you to.
What you have to understand is that our lives aren't a disappointment so much as they crashed and burned with lethal doses of radiation and dog shit.
Randomize
