And on top of all this... he just told me to "chill my nips."
this is the last time we take the mathletes drinking.
I see you felt the need to carve your name in my kitchen table. thanks
He ran headfirst into the atm. Thenasmed us what our spirit animals were...he said his was either a dolphin or a cabbage
lets just say that i have already today: gotten drunk, got in a fight, got stranded an hour away from home, found a ride, sobered up, and slept. woken back up, and here i am. its been a long day. Day drinking is bad for friendships.
You have no idea how pumped I am. I literally plan on dying. You're in my will
You flew out of the bedroom, stole two Solo cups from the beer pong table, put them on your feet, clicked your heels together three times
I wonder how he feels knowing that he's the one who turned me gay
How do I go about this? "Hey, its my birthday in 40 minutes. Would you like to come over for some sex? Also, please bring snacks"?
Am I getting cock blocked by karaoke? That's a first.
From what I remember I had fun, until I threw up, and lost my shoes..
Happy 4 year arrest-aversary! I promise no thanksgiving has been as eventful as that one haha..
My fuck buddy and I talked about Amelia Bedilia for ten minutes before having sex. I think I'm in love.
i really love you but i feel kinda dumb about it
He broke through his window then signed his name on the biggest peice of glass from it. I think they framed it and named it 'best party ever'
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