Buhtt sex?
you're like a bully in the Christmas story
I sent him a picture of my touching myself. He responded back "Your nails look really nice"
He kept referring to his penis a his "love gun"
Dude i think i got lasagna in my eye
Stumbled into class and into a desk. When I fell my bottle broke in my backpack. I had to leave there was vodka everywhere.
Well, at least he doesn't refer to you as his associate. his mattress associate
I think my hand is broken. But his nose definitely is
Oh my god i hate key west. No one takes amex and strippers took all my money
You left your underwear in a sandwich bag on my kitchen counter.
Was your wine and cheese snap taken from the toilet?
Sometimes i think i need to stop drinking because i can't afford losing so many panties anymore
I was fed cake in bed and then was pinned down and ridden till I came. And then fed more cake. I'm going to marry Brad. I'll put money on it.
HE CHOSE A RESTAURANT AND MADE A FUCKING RESERVATION. I AM SHOOK
With each thrust he'd whisper "like a ninja." Should I be flattered or appalled?
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