so last night was fun and all.. but you might want to get tested
Don't worry about it. I've taken so much Plan B, my uterus is purely for show now.
The pick up line I used was "Grab my sack, you'll be back." Then I winked at her.
It smelled like mall pretzels. Of course I investigated.
It was the worst sex ever. All she did was tap on my balls with her hands like she was in a reggae band.
hey, sorry about all the butter. I thought it was gonna help.
I can neither confirm or deny any bear related allegations right at this time.
what's an appropriate "I'm fucking your grandson but I'm trying to hide it" outfit?
I don't think I'd trust a marching band with trampolines to not cause serious damage to themselves/ property.
P.S. The slutty NASCAR driver costume will be saved and used year round for role play.
I'm trying to pinpoint the moment when "don't do anything I wouldn't do" became bad advise.
He paid the bartender with money from the tip jar then proceeded to hit on me in front of my date. I love frat dances
Just had an hour long talk with a woman, turns out she's the mom of the guy i lost my virginity to. Even better his dog was also present.. Meeting the family at its best?
I'M TOO HORNY FOR GRAMMAR!!!
Oh god theyre drunkenly throwing knifes now, definitely the best movie I've worked on
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